First of all, some context - my sleep schedule has gotten totally out of whack lately and I don't know why. So I was asleep this afternoon, pretty much from 1 PM to around 10:30 PM.
At one point, I woke up - not just the sort of idle "mmmmfh, Imwake, goway" sort of waking that normally happens in the middle of sleep. I was bolt-upright, adrenaline-surging awake. Not the kind of "holy shit that was the scariest dream ever" kind of awake, but a truly bizarre thing. A sort of "it all makes sense now" awake.
Apparently, in my sleep, I discovered the secrets to all life.
I lay back on my pillow (ok, sofa cushion) and pondered, grinning like a fool at the ceiling, heart pounding in excitement. Everything was crystalline. I understood - no mere comprehension or recognition, but true, deep, oneness. My mind was unified with all truth. I grokked everything as deeply as one may grok.
More importantly, though, I understood how to communicate this astounding truth. I knew, deeply and intuitively, precisely what to say to share my newfound enlightenment with all of mankind. I lay on the sofa, composing long strains of elegant prose, weaving words and making linguistic magic. Before I fell back asleep, I had written vast tracts of perfect words, an immaculate construction that would revolutionize the way people see our world.
When I woke up again, I couldn't remember a damn bit of it.
Worse yet, I can't remember what I ate just before I went to bed, so I can't even try and replicate it tomorrow. I suspect the tuna salad is to blame, but I can't be sure.
Not to mention that million copy bestseller self help book.
Dang.